Keir Starmer has a BIG problem. His new government is bursting at the seams with ministers who have lobbed THE most hideous insults at the man now set to be Leader of the Free World.

Foreign Secretary David Lammy has been trash-talking the thin-skinned Trump for years, slating him as a neo-Nazi sociopath, a racist and a Ku Klux Klan sympathiser. He’s compared him to Hitler and described him as “deluded, dishonest, xenophobic, narcissistic” and “no friend of Britain”. Hilariously, this week the hypocritical lummox had to furiously backtrack after Trump won by a landslide bleating: “The UK has no greater friend than the US.”

Yes, well that might have been before the likes of Lammy started tearing into Trump. Starmer’s deputy Angela Rayner has called him a “buffoon”. The zealot Ed Miliband called him a “a racist, misogynist groper” and Health Secretary, Wes Streeting, called him “an odious little man”.

Well now that man will be the 47th president of the United States and the “special relationship” with Britain is teetering on a knife-edge thanks to the big-mouthed amateurs who are now running this country.

Yes, Starmer’s trying to limit the damage saying his recent chats with Trump have been friendly and productive. But I’m not buying it for a second because it was only a few weeks ago Trump was threatening to sue this government for electoral interference after 100 Labour activists – paid for by Kamala’s campaign – were flying to the US to help catapult her into the White House.

How bloody stupid are the people in this government not to realise it would break US election law? And what Trump hates more than stupid people are weak people and Kier Starmer is both. Trump will be able to smell his weakness and his fear at 20 paces.

Our PM stands for everything Donald Trump hates and he’ll look at our current government and not see quite how he can do business with it. He will also look at the man Starmer has appointed as his Foreign Secretary and say: “What the f***?”

But rather than acknowledging the mess Lammy has created and doing something about it, Starmer idiotically said this week he wouldn’t be sacked and would remain in post until the next election. How can any minister be guaranteed that?

So, Starmer’s basically saying it doesn’t matter what Lammy does or says – he won’t lose his job. Imagine Starmer’s reaction if Rishi Sunak had said that about any of his ministers who had cocked up on this scale?

Is Starmer really prepared to put the “special relationship” in even more danger because of a man who can’t control his big mouth? I’m not saying leaders of other countries should get to dictate who should be in government here, but if Starmer can’t see Lammy’s a liability and a security risk, then he really shouldn’t be running a country.

But for now the PM needs to find a way to build bridges with Trump. In fact he needs to be crawling on his belly to apologise because it’s HIS government’s idiocy and inexperience that has got us into this mess. And if he doesn’t, this little island of ours is in trouble.

First he needs to apologise for the electoral interference. Then he needs to make Lammy apologise. Another thing he could do is scrap the ludicrous agreement to hand over the Chagos islands (something else Lammy had his cack hand in).

Nigel Farage, who has Trump’s ear, has already made clear this WILL be an issue for Trump. Because while this silly deal currently allows the US and the UK to continue operating its vital military base there – that might not always be the case and THAT puts both our security and the US’s in danger. Starmer also needs to stop sucking up to Europe because that will smash all hopes of better trading terms with America’s pro-Brexit president.

So our PM needs to fix this and start acting like a grown-up. Because who cares if he or his government hates Trump. The fact is Britain needs him. End of!

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The joke that is our Education secretary Bridget Phillipson says schools must stop focusing solely on exam results and instead make pupils feel like they “belong”.

What woke tosh! How is feeling like they “belong” going to get them a job, help them earn money, instil in them the drive, the ambition and the resilience to help them make something of their lives? And how did someone as dumb as Bridget Phillipson ever get to be a government Minister?

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Coleen Rooney could be exempted from doing the trials in this year’s I’m A Celebrity because she says she suffers from reactive arthritis set off by stress.

Okay, so I looked this condition up. Apparently it’s only temporary, it usually affects men between 20 and 50, it lasts around three to five months, and it’s normally triggered by an infection, not stress, and can be controlled with over the counter anti-inflammatories.

I’m not doubting for a second that Coleen suffers from this not terribly serious condition, but at 38 would it really stop her taking part in the trials? There’s some who’d say that, while Coleen wants to be in the show, wants the publicity and the profile, wants the money she doesn’t want to break the fake nails, mess up the hair extensions or look foolish.

It’s not really in the spirit of the show to not participate unless you’re elderly or infirm. I predict that copping out of the trials will see Coleen kicked out of the jungle pretty quickly.

But if the condition really IS bad, maybe she just shouldn’t do the show at all?

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Can it be true that the real reason Harry and Meghan bought their Portuguese bolt hole is because they’re terrified Trump will deport him? Maybe this is why Harry’s been making his clumsy attempts to re-engage with the royal family this year (while never accepting a scintilla of blame for what he’s done)? If so, it’s not because he wants to make up for the pain he’s caused, it’s because he’s frightened Trump’s going to boot him out of the US.

There’s been much talk about the fact Harry may have failed to disclose his drug use on his visa application having admitted in his book, Spare, that he’d used cocaine and cannabis, magic mushrooms and marijuana. And, of course, Meghan hasn’t helped by slating Trump as a misogynist saying she wouldn’t want to live in the US if he was president.

Well, she may now get her wish. Trump has previously suggested that “appropriate action” would be taken if it turned out Harry HAD lied on his visa forms. “I wouldn’t protect him,” he said. “He betrayed the Queen which is unforgivable. He’d be on his own if it was down to me.” Well now it is. So God help Harry if Trump decides to take him on. I don’t see the Donald playing the “never complain, never explain” game. And unlike the royals, he’s not the kind of bloke who’ll stand idly by having been insulted.

I think it’s called karma.

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When asked what she thought of Tom Bower’s latest biography – The House of Beckham – Victoria replied: “Who’s that?”

Who’s she kidding? She knows exactly who the bestselling author and biographer is and she’ll be beyond terrified Bower is about to blow up the carefully crafted PR barricade she’s built up around herself and her family for the past two decades.

If this former investigative journalist gets you in his sights, be afraid – very afraid.

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So now we discover that many highly-paid NHS consultants are gaming the system and earning up to £200,000 in overtime on top of their already generous salaries. Last year’s overtime bill cost the NHS a staggering £1billion and don’t tell me that didn’t have a catastrophic effect on patient care.

Some of these doctors are even going part-time so they can then work extra hours and claim the obscene overtime rates – often four times their normal hourly pay. And some whose contracts allow them to opt out of weekend working are actually working at weekends and claiming it as overtime. How cynical, how cruel is that?

These of course will be the same doctors who went on strike last year claiming they had no choice because the NHS is so desperately short of money. What they didn’t say was part of the reason for that was down to THEIR greed and the fact they are ripping off the NHS at the expense of patient care.

How can any doctor cheat the system knowing that patients could die because of it?

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A new poll says that shoplifting – which costs retailers nearly £2billion a year – can be acceptable. No it can’t. And anyone who believes it can be has to have a twisted sense of morality or they’re one of the thieves.

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So the Tories have just elected their FOURTH female leader – that’s four more than the Labour Party, which is forever screaming that the Tories are racist, sexist and misogynistic. Go figure…